Totemic Inn Comic Opera


"I am so Phucked." --Tess, on the verge of tears, in The Big Bamboozle

Well, Phooey. Until phurther notice, netizens of this phyne Motet site may catch up with my occasional and aperiodic publications variously at HardNewsCafe or on my notorious Utnebury Pages.

For further information on the suppression of the guinea pigs, see {MetaCafe.Moulton.10.1-5}.


Meanwhile, thanks to Colleen Nelson, Totemic Inn Rail Yards, and Phaerie Phyre Productions for suggesting what colors to use for the new parts of the Phreaking Spectrum.

Phight, Phlight, Phreeze, Phuss, Phume, Phumigate,
Phoam, Phloat, Phocus, Phunction, Phoenix Pheather


The Kerfoofle Dialogues

{InfoArchiTexture.Hostly.64.79}: Steve Deering {yesdeer}
 Wed, 30 Apr 2003 22: 29:22 EDT (11 lines)

Dear Alex,

You've got until June 14 to either show up and manage FP or turn over
the Motet/shell account. If you fail to respond to this formal request
with either option, we will be forced to track your ass down and shit
in your hat. There are at least 15 of us, so you're in for a lot of
shit. We're done messing around with being nice about this.

Your friend,

Barry Kort


{InfoArchiTexture.Hostly.64.80}: Mittens the Merciless {judy98}
 Wed, 30 Apr 2003 23:06:13 EDT (1 line)

I can't do it. It would be too cruel


{InfoArchiTexture.Hostly.64.81}: John Pelligrino {skonk}
 Thu, 01 May 2003 00: 55:40 EDT (1 line)

   Not as cruel as shitting directly on his head.


{InfoArchiTexture.Hostly.64.83}: Mittens the Merciless {judy98}
 Thu, 01 May 2003 05:23:28 EDT (17 lines)

Dear Frank,

I believe that the interests of Fresh Press would be best served by a
totally different management style altogether, and it would be in the
best interests of the board and the posters alike if several of the
hosts were removed, the more obstreperous posters booted out, and the
remainder of the site panelled up until the flame wars settled down,
the hosts were made to understand that this is NOT their board, but
the admin., and order has been restored.

Therefore I am asking that you turn control of Fresh Press over to
the Speakeasy management, where I can assure you the gentle touch of
the webmaster and her henchmen will have that place shipshape in no
time flat.  Just look at what she's done for Speakwasy!

Dana Davis 


"By accessing this site, I hereby agree that I won't never try to to sue this message board or anyone who posts here over anything they might say about me. Because I'm a fucking grownup and I realize that they prolly woonta said shit if I never logged in, so I brang it all on myself anyway." --Proposed Totemic Inn Social Contract

"Never doubt that a single innovative suppressed MetaCafe miscreant can Moultonize These Totems. Indeed, it's the first creature that always has." --Senator Zyklon B. Pussyphart

"If you can't stand the adoration, get off the Totem Pole." --Harry Truman